Thursday, April 24, 2008

Don't Believe the Hype

Hey there little Judy,

How did you like ‘Take Your Daughter to Work Day? What? It's take your Child to work day? Thats ridiculous, men don't have to be convinced to go to work, they don't have any other choice! Haha i know, sucks to be them, right? Anyhoo , Daddy took you to his very important office with very important ID cards didn't he now?

I bet you rode on an elevator with the TV inside which was so cool! It was like a spaceship, right? And then you saw all the people he spends time with when he’s not going to your ballet recitals. Were they nice? Most of them don't have hair, and the ones that do talk too loud. Some of the ladies have candy on their desks, but then they expect you to talk to them like all the time. I hope you stayed away from the bad candy people, Judy.

What next? Did he have pictures of mommy in his cube? He usually keeps those in the drawer where his assistant can’t see them….what did you ask?...why would he hide mommy?... no sweetie, of course they still love you- they just don’t really love each other anymore! That’s why they sleep in separate bedrooms. Anyway, I’m just kidding about the pictures, mmkay? Here, have a cookie I scavenged from the conference room. That meeting was over like 4 hours ago anyway.

So Daddy gets to leave the office at noon everyday? That’s so cool, where? Oh, just to the cafeteria?! That's okay too. Were the lines long? They’re always a mile long in my super sweet subsidized cafeteria!

Did he get that mediocre sushi that he’s utterly sick of and pays out the ass for before returning to his desk and fighting back tears to keep his eyes open through the remainder of the day? I do that too!

What did you do next? Did you ride the train with all the crackheads and numerous other suited up wierdos? I know- that’s totally the best part of my day! Did you fight back touching any of them so that when the train car jolts, you made sure not to contract AIDS?!? That’s an important part of the journey. Weeeeeeeeeee work is fun!”

Sign you up, right? Tennis games and sit down lunches are for wimps, Judy.

This sounds SO much better than being a trophy wife.

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