Apparently financial analysts at Credit Suisse are good for something more than holding your place in line at Shake Shack. Keith Signer, one such analyst, chose to conduct research on obesity and fast food restaurants by only patronizing fast food chains for the month of April. He is setting out to prove that the stuff doesn’t really have an adverse effect on cholesterol and weight (What would he do if he were covering Phillip Morris?) . Anyway, his daily menu, as quoted by the Post, is as follows:
“Egg McMuffin, no cheese, no margarine; small OJ; half of Domino's hand-tossed pizza with red peppers; 20 oz. Coke; McDonald's southwest chicken salad, lite sesame ginger dressing and an apple pie.”
Major kudos to Keith for trying to garner familiarity with the companies he covers but guy, give me a break. A few points, if I may:
1. If I ate salad for dinner every night (instead of the bloody steaks and 8 bourbons that comprise my typical menu) I’d have Heidi Klum’s body and Lance Armstrong’s lung capacity. That's like me committing to smoking cigarettes in an effort to prove that it doesn't cause lung cancer but oops, I don't inhale.
2. An egg mcmuffin with no cheese or margarine? How does one remove margarine from a pre-packaged sandwich that has traveled cross country in the back of a frozen truck? I’m calling your bluff.
3. How does your girlfriend like eating in restaurants where the chairs are attached to the table? Poor thing is probably counting down the days until her May 1st trip to Balthazar (you have booked that already, right? Right??)
Seriously Keith, I have questions, you’ve got answers. Show me what you’re working with.
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2 comments:
girl this is not a very well-conceived posting on your part. i won't patronize you by asking if you have even read the research instead of just the Post article because i can tell that you did not.
there are a couple of objects here. one is to do a side-by-side comparison of the "healthy" options offered by QSRs, and to that extent Keith is doing a very good job.
another is to examine the question if it is possible to eat "healthy" at only QSRs. that is to say, does one necessarily become fat just by virtue of dining at these establishments, or is it a result of poor menu choices being made by the customer, as opposed to the straw man that you set up in point 1.
the "Super Size Keith" project is actually a pretty useful piece of research, and many of us who cover the industry are interested in not only the conclusion at the end but also the thematic research discussions examined in each weekly update, e.g. the potential cost of updating menus and materials to reflect nutritional info, the potential costs to reduce sodium if salt becomes the next trans fat, etc.
the quality of Mr. Siegner's research really puts the lie to your claim that you are extremeley talented at "recogniz[ing] the ludicrous, the silly, the outright laughable" when you see it.
p.s. Keith has a wife and kids, a fact you would know if you actually read some of his work, as he has complained about the added time and expense of always driving out to pick up his meals instead of spending time with his family. to answer at least the spirit of your question #3, though, his wife is not thrilled.
Dear Buzz Killington,
Just to clarify, all of Eff the Police's posts are ill-concieved. And we'd appreciate if our commenters reflected a similar lack of judgement so that we might preserve the good times in here.
Ever thankful for the added wisdom however,
Girl
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